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In this interview we dive into the first year after Gastric Bypass surgery. This period is also known as the honeymoon phase. A time in which most people lose a lot of weight quickly, feel good and gain more and more self-confidence.
Remco is still in the middle of his first year. He shares how he is doing, the changes, and the ups and downs.
You're still in the middle of your first year after your Gastric Bypass. How is it going so far?
“Yes, it's funny that the first year is called the honeymoon phase, because I do indeed feel great. Although a few months ago it was a different story. I developed 2 intestinal hernias. It's indescribably painful and it really scared me. So I had surgery again for that. An intestinal hernia after a stomach reduction isn't very common, but I would rather have been prepared for it.”
How intense. How long did it take you to recover from that?
“I had to recover for another 6 to 8 weeks. The first weeks I rested, but stubborn as I am, I tried to get back to work quickly. I also couldn't exercise for a while. That's why the first period didn't exactly feel like a honeymoon phase. I'm only starting to experience it now. Thinking: okay, you're allowed to be here. I feel happy.”
“At my heaviest I weighed around 130 kilos; now I weigh 85 kilos. I've lost almost 50 kilos!”
What was that like a year ago? What did you see in the mirror then?
“I never saw myself as that chubby guy. In the mirror I always thought I looked fine. Until someone took a photo of me and I thought: that's not me, that can't be. Now, when someone takes a photo of me, I see - besides my personality and presence - that I'm allowed to be here. I look at myself with more appreciation now.”
“I pause much more at beautiful moments. I make sure I don't get lost in my head or hide behind a mask.”
What has changed for you personally?
“I pause much more at beautiful moments. I make sure I don't get lost in my head or hide behind a mask. I try to be much more in the moment. Enjoying the time I spend with family and friends. I enjoy shopping again. In the past nothing fitted me and I bought all my clothes online. Now it's all possible again and I feel a lot more confident.”
What do you do now that you didn't do before?
“I talk openly and honestly about what I'm going through. On social media, but also in conversations with people around me. Not always easy, but I now dare to raise difficult subjects, whereas before I just accepted everything. I also wasn't open about my emotions. People just had to read from my face how I felt; I never said anything about it. That's different now.”
Everyone has an off day now and then; that's part of life. How do you deal with that?
“In the past I would easily stay in bed until 4 in the afternoon. Now I still crawl onto my bed, but to meditate for half an hour. I listen to a guided meditation, focus on my breathing and am consciously in the moment. Taking a walk now and then or going to the gym helps me too. Even if it's reluctantly, you're still making a healthy choice. In the end, all those small things add up to the big change.”
Food also helps you feel good and energetic. How do you eat at the moment?
“I still eat 7 small portions a day*. Sometimes I challenge myself and grab a piece of chocolate or 2. Of course I sometimes make the wrong choices too. But on the whole it's going well and I've found my structure. I can eat everything, though I do choose consciously - for example wholegrain pasta, cauliflower rice and sweet potato. I eat yoghurt with fruit and seeds. I make sure there's variety. I do still cook too much and often have portions left over. Then I freeze them for later - meal prepping, they call it. On the other hand, someone can always stay for dinner. Which is fun!”
Besides food, are there other things that help you live healthily?
“After I recovered from my intestinal hernias, I started exercising again. I go to the gym 2 times a week, and a 3rd time if I feel like it. And I row for fifteen minutes every day. Because I was losing weight too quickly, I'm no longer allowed to take 10,000 steps and have to take it a bit easier. I also take multivitamins, though finding the right ones was quite a search. They sit differently with everyone. For example, I find capsules heavy on the stomach, so I feel full quickly. Whereas a chewable tablet works fine. I also use Calcium Soft Chew with added vitamin D. It's just like a sweet - I'm really happy with it. So you truly have to see what sits well for you.”
“The biggest changes aren't about the kilos. I hardly ever step on the scales anymore and I eat everything I like. I do make healthy choices, and I'm much more self-aware.”
Something else that may have changed is the compliments you get about the new version of yourself. How do you experience those reactions?
“Very nice, of course, but they don't fully land yet. Out of insecurity, I think. I also have the feeling people think I expect them to say something about my transformation. But that's really not necessary. I try not to let my insecurity dominate, but I still am insecure. Then again, we all have insecurities. I try to focus on the beautiful things, on what I'm proud of.”
What are the biggest changes after your Gastric Bypass operation?
“It's not the kilos, because I hardly ever step on the scales anymore and I eat everything I like. I do make healthy choices, and I'm much more self-aware. My mindset is the biggest change, I think. And yes, I still feel alone from time to time. I would love to meet someone. To be able to share everything with a partner. But as long as that person isn't there, I shape my own life. I don't want to be dependent and find happiness in someone else. I have to become happy myself. Cherish what I do have. I work on that every day.”
Do you have one last tip?
“Do your research before you choose an operation. Listen to podcasts, read about it. When you then make the decision, think about why you're doing it. Is it for yourself, or because someone else expects it? Choose yourself, and then go for it completely. Believe it will work out - then it will be fine.”
*Usually the advice is to eat 6 times a day after a stomach reduction. Your dietitian or doctor may advise something different, and you may need more or less food. Reasons for this include your weight and whether you are a man or a woman.
The interview was originally a Dutch FitForMe podcast. Using AI, the interview was translated and written down so that Remco's story could be shared with all FitForMe customers.
